Hugs

• Hugs are underrated.
• Hugs are powerful.
• Hugs are important.
• Hugs can mean a many things.
• Hugs are a way of showing love.
• Hugs are a way of showing support.
• Hugs are a way of giving comfort.
• Hugs are a way of expressing consolation.
• Hugs show more that the content of words.
• Hugs are a way to express emotions.
• Hugs are a way to demonstrate how you feel towards a person.
• Hugs create the bonding chemical Oxytocin.
• Hugs can improve health.
• Hugs can improve the recipient’s self-esteem.
• Hugs convey a message.
• Hugs can be formal or meaningful.
• Hugs can release Oxytocin and give us that warm fuzzy feeling.
• Hugs bring people close together.
• Hugs can lower your heart rate and blood pressure before stressful events.
• Hugs reduce stress by comforting in times of help

After a conversation a few days ago, I gave a girl a lingering hug. At the conclusion, with a big smile, she stated: “I feel so good.” Never think about giving a hug, just do it. I tend to put my arms out as an invite to a hug with an invite written on my face. Words are not needed.

There is a message in a hug. A huf is not just a hug. Messages are given in the way you hug. It is the way you squeeze the other person. It appears that the hug releases endorphins partly due to the proximity of the other body and partly due to the feeling of togetherness. You can give a little shake during the hug. You can move hands in the hug. You can very the strength during the hug, You can give an extra little squeeze towards the end of the hug. You can make the hug last an embarrassingly long time. There is a whole compendium of hug procedures.

Messages are conveyed that are influenced by the firmness of the hug, the duration of the hug, and any adjustment to the strength of the hug during the hug. It is much more noticeable between males and females. A respect between a male and female can be demonstrated with the hug. The hug will also show respect for the other person’s sexuality without any sexuality. A lingering hug relays that you are extremely comfortable together.

A hug is often used as a greeting as an alternative to a handshake. As such, the hug is formal and contains little in its message.

We all occasionally hug others, and each hug has its own personality.

To further your study of emotions, in your future hugs, I request you to monitor the effect that the hug is having on you ‘deep down inside’. In other words, the effect it is having on your subconscious self. Also attempt to detect the the effect that you have on the other person. This would be a new observation. In doing so, you may even notice that the other person is responding to the caharacteristics of your hug. There may be a hidden gamesmanship. So, in your next hug, the game is on! Your next hug is the start of a new game! Hugs will take on a new significance. Again, I just ‘accidentally’ caught the eyes of the waitress and got a cute smile.

Sometimes, I delay the end of the hug beyond what feels natural. If the person has already demonstrated a respect for you, it may be a reaffirming feeling for them. Never forget that this may be another person amonsgst millions that have serious self-image issues.

Mirrors don’t help human lives. Imagine life before mirrors! We would never know what we looked like. If I look in a mirror, I instinctively analyze the look of my face and wonder if it looks adequate for meeting people. But most of the time, I have zero concern for what my face looks like. If people are happy to look at me, I know that my face is ok. The only time I doubt the adequacy of my looks is when I look in a mirror. It is up to others whether they like looking into my eyes and face. My opinion on the adequacy of my face is irrelevant.

So many people you meet will have been brought up in fatherless families. They will have components missing in their lives. One girl said to me as her confidence was building: “Andy, I walked into a room of people and I felt justified in being there.” I was horrified! How could somebody be in a room and not be justified in breathing the air shared by others? The person you hug may need justification. I am confident that your hugs will improve your health and the health of others. Your hug will give you and others more self-esteem. Always be aware that others around you may have serious self-image issues. The reason may simply be modern social pressures. In my everyday life, but especially when travelling, I get many many thanks for casual advice and reassurance.

That said, be wary of overdoing the length of the hug. The long hug is only appropriate in some situations. A simple rule is to hug as long as the other keeps hugging. I sometimes relax my hug, but if the other person maintains the grip, I re-energize my hug until I feel they are releasing. A hug is way more complex than we may realize. However, intuition generally solves the issue. One girl gave me a simple rule: maintain the hug for as long as the other person want the hug to last.

We hug our grandparents differently to our parents, to our friends, to our children, or new acquaintances. Every hug is different. Just as you speak in a different manner to different persons, you hug in different manners. The simple thing to do is rely on intuition whilst monitoring the subconscious to get the most out of the hug for your well-being and more so for the well being of the recipient.

There are similar issues with ‘pats on the back’ or shoulder and ways of dealing with children. Much of this has got more complicated with the advent of ‘me-to’ culture, cancel culture, and woke culture. If the person presents with an aggressive scowl, they are better left in their misery as they have often been trained that anything you do is due to some mythical toxicity that is somehow unique to males and not feminists.

Wikipedia has something closer to a definition:

“A hug is a form of endearment, found in virtually all human communities, in which two or more people put their arms around the neck, back, under the arm-pits or waists of one another and hold each other closely. If more than two people are involved, it may be referred to as a group hug.”

Jane O’Brien beautifully writes:

“Hugging is underrated, powerful, and compelling.

“By balancing the purity of simply wanting to embrace another human as a means to showcase your love to them with the intimacy that can also be derived from a tight embrace, different types of hugs can do a lot.

“And by doing a lot, we mean so in an emotional manner. Hugging is key to building trust and bringing yourself closer in both the physical realm and in your relationship. It is a definitive means by which your body language can act as a medium to express your feelings.

“From enhancing your love life to promoting overall comfort in your relationship, hugging should never be forgotten or taken for granted.”

To initiate a hug in an appropriate situation, which may be more often than you think, I stretch my arms out wide and put a welcoming ‘I wish to hug you’ expression on my face. To get the ‘I wish to hug you’ expression, I think into my brain: ‘I wish to hug you’ and the subconscious will automatically generate a ‘I wish to hug you’ expression. Here is an example.